#40 I would NOT grow a beard.

I don't need to tell you that our band teacher isn't very intimidating.

Actually, yes I do. You've probably never seen him.

At any rate, one day some people told him he should grow a beard.

Unfortunately for them, he's allergic to facial hair.

And yet, he's not exactly what you'd call "clean-shaven."

However, musicians should never grow beards.

Think about it. Who has beards?

ZZ Top.

David Crowder.

Debussy. (Yes, I have a deep dislike for the music of Debussy.)

The only good musician that had a beard was Brahms (pictured), and he did it right.

Not like people grow beards today.

Not to mention his SWEET tie.

The ancient Greeks thought that beards separated the men from the boys.

Times changes, my Greeks. Beards separate the musicians from the drummers. (Although Brice did shave his off.)

Mutton chops, however, are acceptable.

Rossini, who wrote William Tell, had mutton chops.

Beethoven, who wrote everything else, had mutton chops (when he was younger).

Martin van Buren had mutton chops.

What's that you say? Van Buren was a president?

Perhaps, but he was the coolest president to ever be elected.